Argument, solve or learn from it..

Back in the days, with my childish mentality, I would love to argue a lot but never win anything, which at the end of the day it seem pointless to argue at my parents.

Personally, arguments is something to be avoided, but if you have something to say with positive intentions, and not trying to destroy someone(OK that is too much), I mean its fair enough to argue about something, but if no one can be the better person to understand and feel the message and does not have the power to forgive and let it go, do not bother arguing.

From experience of arguing and becoming the guy who can forgive, I feel a lot better than arguing with someone then held a grudge on a person which seems unhealthy for me to think about.

Argument can be good or bad on how you want it to be done.

Its bad enough if : 

  • It ends in an eternal fight/ grudge, shit happens can become a bit out of control ( any abuse actions)
  • it became a verbal abuse, which then leads to emotional suffering
  • nothing changes, whats your point here? I am sure you want to solve things..not make things hard
  • you do not say your argument points clearly, you can loose if it is this way

 

There is more of these examples, I am pretty sure you have went through it.

It is good:

  • to state your points clear with positive intention, to make things better and understanding
  • to express your mind freely on what you have to say
  • if you feel emotionally hurt and want to let go, have someone to talk to, try to express the situation so you can get better suggestion from your peers.
  • to argue if something is not right, and if the other person does not get it…then he does not get it, so cut it out and hope they get the message, if not then screw it. Do you really need this person attention? nope? just walk away .

To state facts with clear arguments, state opinion to express your thoughts, but do not let your thoughts hurt just because someone says its bad or anything, if you think it’s the right way..then it is the right way.

walking away does not mean coward, does not mean loser too. Only low-minded people would think this way, because they can’t think of the bigger picture, or maybe ask themselves why they do it? Think different perspective if you want to become a better person, don’t judge.

 

Enjoy your day guys, I hope you get the message here .

Cheers.

iqra winhastania

via Daily Prompt: Argument

Nostalgia, the Test you went through..

 

I wanted you to know that, I was a bit depressed and worried during my trip. My parents did not let me travel at all, I had to go through some Test just to Beg how I wanted this trip to work and leave a mark on my life that “It was a pleasuring trip” . I took the trip even when I made a lot of mistakes in the process and I learnt and hope I don’t make the same mistake twice. 

keep living, we’re humans after all.

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Take the swing I say. Feel the breeze. Live the moment.

via Photo Challenge: Nostalgia

Personally, I don’t like test. It brings back the school memory. it sucked! just had to go through it.

I did this and that kind of test, even if I have to test the people i know. I feel like i understand things a lot more better in general, do not neglect the power of testing.

Test your emotions. Test your wisdom, Test yourself.

Experience is your best teacher, maybe hard, maybe easy . In the end, it’s the action you do determines who you are, not the test you are doing. Live the life, be grateful and humble.

“Be happy. When you do, help someone be happy. You might as well be one of those beautiful people who deserves the best from giving happiness” – I wrote that up( problems?contact me 😀 )

cheers, Iqra

 

Hustling Unfinished Business

 Unfinished Hustle to me means major problem.
so fix it.

In life we tend to have lots of things we want to do but some times lack the work. I hate it when I do leave things unfinished and I am certain will 100% regret it at the end of the day, and regrets can stay with your life forever(annoying..)

Back in the days, I would love to go there and there…but i never finish it.

“Some people change buses to go see  different things half way, but they will never reach to their end of their journey. Stop going back to the station. “

“If you want to reach at the end of your journey, stay in one bus, you just mastered that journey.”

Now hold up, I hope you dont try to think smart such as “uhh if I stopped in the middle..then ill just hitchhiking..” please read it till the end and i hope you understand my point.

The moral of the story here is, if you keep changing things like how you keep changing your mind half way through the journey, you will never reach its end, the result. Some times it is better to stick to one bus and let the process finish so you can master the journey it takes you ,either expects good or greater results from doing so(they are called experience for a reason)

I saw this quote from somewhere(i dont quite remember who says it) and I state it here for future reference and readers.



How is this quote relates to unfinished story?

The Scenario is if you relate this as a traveler and you wanted to explore the place, and you do not know anything about the place, you travel spontaneously arrived in somewhere that maybe English speaking was not an option to get help from, even if you tried signals.

In the station you would expect buses to be going to different destination. You choose one of the bus ride that takes you somewhere, at some point you don’t like the views or the route it takes at some period of time, at this point you might think its time for a change, you think you had enough of the it, so you prefer to go back to the station and get another bus.

You might keep on going like this on and on and never be satisfied with the journey, but will you ever reach the bus final destination? nope. Is there a point of getting shortcuts in here? no.

If one minds was to think that staying in one bus and reach the end of its journey, I am pretty sure the travel will be worthed and experienced . The point is, what if at the end of the journey is a wonderful place you did not know of? you will regret eventually.

The point here is whatever bus you pick, stay on its journey to its end,  you will learn that a journey has its START and END. Same like the skill sets that human was provided , it all depends on which they want to choose . From there, you may learn skills that you can master.

To put it in the system, it is possible to learn any skills, but you need to learn to master a skill that will take its time and is preferred to be learnt one by one(dont you agree?), because in general there is now way you can learn all of them. That one skill will guide you for your needs in the future, the rest is up to you to learn anything you want.



Personally, this quotes tells me about discipline and knowing what you want,what ever you choose you have to enjoy its journey fully till the end to get what you needed as per goals.

Hustle is an important word, that is what Gary Vaynerchuk would say, well it is definitely is an important word to me. I have been struggling in life because I lacked the hustle in me(i wish i could have known it sooner), which is why I have unfinished work and do plan to get back up .

What I want you guys to get from my message here, whatever you started,work till the end(results),enjoy the process to work your way through it,you might as well be satisfied with the results you made soon. Do not give up, have patience! Because if you think the road you choose is not easy, then it is not going to be easy, the moment you stopped in the middle or the process or try to think “i cant do it” or “i am not up for it” than  you just let it become unfinished business. You need to pull yourself together!

“It is never too early to hustle, keep hustling.”

Iqra Winhastania

 

WPC: Island Quest


Quest , is a powerful word with regards to life.

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One of Jakarta port
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Boat Ride


At the end of the day, you will love the results on what you work on:

 

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Pulau Perak(Silver Island)


It is not so bad to live like an outcast on an island once in your life, because you would  definitely learn how to survive like a natural human being.

Life on island can be fun and boring to some people, just depends on how they see life, and of course with the current technology it may not be their option to go for. I took the path because I really needed some adventure in my life, I have lived both life and I think it is always nice to take a break from the technology the society provide for a while.

enjoy nature, be with nature.

 

Jump, to start or to end..

 

This topic is something personal related to me, Jump.

 

  • you can jump, to avoid holes in the ground(troubles or problem).

 

  • you can jump, to start something better.

 

  • jump, as high as you can to reach as high as you can, sky is not the limit of imagination.

 

  • jump to overcome your fears, jump..jump..jump.

 

In general jump, is to hop or to reach high, but the words itself has deeper meaning than itself. Words can be define differently to each person or feelings to each person.

it has been used countless of times in motivational quotes to get someone minds get started.

such as:

DARE to JUMP” – meaning JUST DO IT in another way of saying it.

“Sometimes you have to JUMP off the bridge and HOPE you can FLY“- sense of hope

“if you got BIG obstacle, JUMP HIGHER” – face your problem

these are just couple of example the means something to me, but may have a different view to others on how they read or take it.

 

my sad experience with the word JUMP is when I thought of SUICIDE.

yep scary.

I feel like i have been living in a chaos world, that i thought there is no hope for me. I feel so helpless and useless. I trained myself to be calm, so whenever I get mad it does not really shows in my face, but it was hard keeping it inside, so you gotta learn how to meditate yourself, and be one with your mind. I am glad i was strong enough to overcome my suicidal thoughts but it will still keep coming to me everyday, this also depends on how bad my day would have gone through, such as bad test? accidents? relationships? mistakes? many more !!even the slightest small things that could turn things bad, no joke.

this is why, emotional is a good trait, but use it for the wrong reason ,you might have end your life. Emotion is a good, people sometimes use feeling to connect, that is socially acceptable, but please do not use your emotional character too far that you may end thinking far off the boundaries and begin to think unconsciously of what you are doing.

bad days can happen, and when that happens…you can JUMP.

jump over you bad days, so you can start jump another day and live happy.

thank you readers,

iqra

 

 

 

 

Start and Ends, Panic

Panic  is one of human characteristic that is developed through fear and bad past experience in my view.

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I had many panic attack, in different situation, but it was mostly personal experience.

I wanna share my stories and tell you guys what I learned from this, hopefully it can be any use to who ever reading it and understand how I live my life in panicked situation.

 

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first time accident, I was a kid and I hurt my sister, I panicked. i was a kid, i know nothing but i panicked because my sister was hurt and im pretty sure i cant express through my face but my mind is going round and around thinking whats happening? I think i did something wrong? what happened to my sister?...I don’t quite recall my past so well but she got a scar on her chin, im very sorry sister 😦

lesson: I was a kid, I know nothing, it’s not like I can talk perfectly that time but the memory is too clear for me to erase it.

first time swimming, I panicked for my life, am i going to survive? how to swim this shit? why can’t i swim? emotional build up of being scared to swim but I swam after several tries. yay!

back-to-school

first time school problem, had a gang fight (yea I was some badass kid haha jokes), but I was just watching my friends do the fight. Got called off to principal,i panicked for the trouble i didn’t even do, at least support my friends(oh why I didn’t have the balls to tell them i didn’t do a thing..lesson learned) FML, I thought my school life is over, thinking too much that time, i thought they going to call my parents..i MEGA panicked because im pretty sure my parents would not like the story. Anyways it was all sort it out in school, with a detention of course…heh.

lesson: you can panic as much as you want, but always know that you are not wronged and try to speak up because you’re not at fault for it to happen.

first time bullying (im sorry I didn’t mean to hurt you, I swear), he was saying words to me that time, I was still  kid during this time( as I try to sort out my panicked situation chronologically) , I was mad, went out of control, but when i saw he cried…my heart-felt sorry because this is not the type of person I am, im very sorry my dear friend(I emotionally learned to become a better person).

lesson: for this one, especially for little kids who reads this(do they read this? I don’t know? but if they do well hear me out), don’t get too emotional, it may turn out to be the worst thing you have ever done and you might regret loosing them, just be sorry at the end and apologize sincerely, listen to your heart and mind.

I just got my first toy from what my dad bought me, then I broke it accidentally. it was a plane i broke the antenna to control the plane that time. i locked up myself in the room wishing my father will not reach me, i cried so much that i wish i didn’t do such a thing, at that time, life was hard, hard earnings from my father, I can still remember how he was mad and may have thought “how ungrateful this child is..”. I locked my self for a while until he can calm down, he did eventually but with a disappointment in his face because i can feel it.(anyways he tried to fix my toy)

lesson: oh I wish I can undo the past, i wish i could say i accidentally broke it, i did not mean it father, i was cry baby that time. it’s either face it or run away.

another gang fight during my childhood years because of people tryna act though(oh I wish we can solve this in a civilized way…but kids is still a kid at that time). I rush to help out my fiend because i was one of the tough guys back then, the shield, the guardian. the moment they strike back, I panicked that i don’t want any of my friends to hurt. we solved it with some adults around, what a day..

lesson: for this one, I do not regret for the first time..but if it happens alot..oh boy im done with things. its ok to help your buddies out, but if you don’t want trouble just stay out of it if possible.

I had my driving license, I made a few crash accidents, i panicked as hell to think of what my father would say to me. guess whats my first crash was? the parking pole? haha funny ye? I even tried to hide the facts from my parents that i crashed the pole because my panicked mind cant talked the truth, but eventually they found out..well it was kinda obvious in a way.

lesson: back then I was such a run away kid. I wish i can be upfront to any problems I had and tell it to them. whats the worst thing that could happen? honesty was all it need(I know it can be hard some times)

I got my highschool result, I got some bad grades, i panicked to tell them to my parents and of course i kept them for weeks until they found out..it was not nice, i wish i could had said it to them earlier i got bad grades than to expect something more. it really sucks when you don’t understand how your mind works.

lesson: just say it, cause no matter how long you kept it for..they will soon find out. parents are good detective , don’t mess.

panic-button

more or less I have lived panic situation a lot. those stories were not the end.. I wanna tell them but maybe you guys might get bored. to summarize it, i still do get a couple of car accidents and of course at start i was scared and panic of what should i do, and like the world motto says “face it or run away” nothing can be undone because things happen for a reason(tire puncture happens most of the time..GOSH!).

panic in general to me is my gateway to understand problem,if it happens you either face it or run away, of course from now(I don’t mean now..but I did before) i face my problem so its clear and understandable. From today and on, you can become a better person from learning your panicked situation just like I am. I both understand logically and emotionally how to handle panicked situation.

such as:

when the police ask for license and registration, normally people my age may or may not get panicked, but since I know they just want THAT thing I think to myself..

“what to be panicked about..”

“face it or run away”, no other way round. but I strongly say to you people to always FACE the situation, it will feel so much better than to think of regrets and things you would have done(which you could have done earlier)

write to you soon,

iqra

Personality: silence

There was always a time where you got to be silence. It can be anything ranging from that situation to something situation(lol?).

 

my examples:

  • silence when you know some truth
  • silence when someone passed away( of course being sad, does not mean you have to cry, some people out there have deep emotion inside they tend to keep it in )
  • silence when your angry at someone(ooh the silent treatment hurts you know…*ignored*)
  • silence when you want to listen to someone speaking(speeches)

and many more really etc. I could go all the way on how we use silence in daily life

 

I have so many silence situation, and im pretty sure they may sound embarrassing to share but i would just say it this time, as a way to express my thoughts to the world, free of mind and clarity.(i just don’t like to keep things in my head..)

In the early days, I was such a shy kid that i don’t even want to engage in social activities, i try to talk but i always thought things might go wrong after what i say, that is when my silence to the mind.

Even when I made a problem, i was so scared and i stayed silence for the rest of the day not to talk about what i did. In the end when someone found out , I thought there was no point in keeping silence.

oh I don’t mean silence is all bad, i am pretty sure everyone agrees with that

There are times when silence is required, such as keeping secrets .I am pretty sure you do not want your secrets to be exposed then boom everyone knows what you do..(i will be at room regretting all day if i had a friend that does it, and probably cut him off from my trust circles).

Moreover, understand you might talked too much that you thinks you should stay silence for a moment and let my partner/friends chance to talk. In dating game you need to be talkative(of course you need too) to approach, because there is no excitement if you just stay silence. i do not think there is any person who likes to stay silence all the time because i am pretty sure we all do need to say something to someone.

you know what they say:

“some people talk big and work less, quite people build success over time”

I heard it somewhere but i am not sure of the right words(forgive me people >.<)

silence_good_anwer

I actually agree with that quote, i tend to stay quite and silence all the time because i feel i am working on something that i should not talk until i get there(just the type of person i am tbh).

the right concept of silence in this quote in business term, is that you need to keep it low profile because in the end you do not want to talk about this project or BIG business plan to anyone which in the end if it does not work out and probably expect some boos in the way or punching words from the crowd.

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Overall, silence is great in how people use it. it is socially accepted to anyone who wants to asocial for personal or cultural reason, you can also keep silent if you did something wrong but in the end it someone can find out (the quote saying “you can either face it or run away from it”). Some times you may get carried away and talk bullshit, which is why by past experience some people prefer silence. its up to you how you want to use silent, it can be good and a bad thing, it’s all up to the choice we take.

cya boys and girls, iqra

via Silence